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Thread: *Radio Free Saturn*
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Old 12-23-2003, 12:12 AM   #81
Ikhnaton
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trippy

www.badgerbadgerbadger.com
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Old 12-23-2003, 02:59 AM   #82
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Creepy


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 12-23-2003, 07:55 AM   #83
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Sorry, mate, but the badger always wins... Savvy?


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Old 12-23-2003, 08:53 AM   #84
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Exclamation Meles meles ad infinitum...

Ray: The existentialist line starts way around back of the building. Go on--move along, now.

Ike: Buh?

Kylilin: 'It's Princess Leia, the yodel of life--give me my sweater back, or I'll play the guitar...!' Why, I was saying just that the other day.

Tonight:

Christmas Dinner with the Skywalkers: a Christmas/Hannukah/Kwanzaa holiday special presentation

Luke: Oh, this is great...just great! Here we are, trying to have a normal Christmas dinner together, and all dad can do is harp on me!

Darth: I am not harping. I'm just saying that you should have gone to the Space Academy instead of running off to join a bunch of burned-out rebel hippies. My son, the terrorist...

Padme: Please, Ani--

Leia: Aren't you supposed to be dead?

Padme: I don't know. The third movie hasn't come out yet.

Zoom: Say, that turkey looks delicious. Could someone pass me some?

Luke: But I'm an important man in the Rebel Alliance, not just some space drifter! You should be proud of all my accomplishments. I'm a jedi, and a great warrior, known throughout the galaxy.

Darth: Hah! Your little sister is twice as important to the Rebel Alliance as you are.

Luke: But she didn't blow up your precious battle station, did she, dad? Who did blow it up? It was ME wasn't it?!?

Darth: Please. I blew up my first battle station when I was eight years old--right after winning the podrace at the Boonta's Eve tournament.

Zoom: Really, could someone pass me the turkey?

Leia: Dad, why must you always measure Luke against your accomplishments? Why can't you just be satisfied with him for his own sake?

R2-D2: *Beep! Beep! Whistle, squeak!* (Translation: 'Actually, it was me in the droid socket that blew up both of your battle stations.')

Darth: You shut up there, missy. Your brother has been gallavanting about the galaxy in tights, dragging the Skywalker name through the mud--

Luke:--Which you dropped, *Mr. Vader.*

Darth: Can you blame me?

Padme: Will you two please stop arguing just this once, and let us have a peaceful, happy family meal? For me?

Luke: How can I eat peacefully with the arch-villain of evil incarnate hissing like a broken iron lung across the table from me?

Darth: That does it--I'm cutting your other hand off!

Zoom: No, THAT DOES IT! ALL I WANT IS FOR SOMEONE TO PASS ME THE F*CKING TURKEY, AND NO ONE WILL STOP ARGUING LONG ENOUGH TO HAND IT TO ME!!!

*(Dead silence.)*

Padme: Zoomie, in this family we just levitate the plate over ourselves.

Luke: You were adopted.









(Merry Christmas!)
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Old 12-23-2003, 02:55 PM   #85
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categorism?

(me? i am not going to do such dirty things zoom.. and also i errr... nah. i never heard of existuuhmwhat? i thought three times of the word sex before i managed reading the whole word.. )


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Old 12-23-2003, 09:19 PM   #86
Ray Jones
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heyheyhey aresen.. now exlusive on rfs .. just for you guys.. my favorite 'weihnachtslied'

ladies and gentlemen

live here at the rfs studios

'die fantastischen vier' feat. the listening ray jones *nods* and ray's favorite 'weihnachtslied': 'frohes fest'


*fadd beat playing*

mein bruder sagt er hätte jetzt die nase voll
denn der schnee in diesem jahr der wär mal richtig toll
bevor er geht macht er sich noch einen frisch
und der rest meiner familie sitzt am gabentisch
familie kann man das nicht nennen paps darf nicht mit mutti pennen
denn vor einem halben jahr lernte sie nen andern kennen
doch der streit ist heut vergessen mutti lebt mit uns allein
paps geht nach dem essen und der andre kommt herein
meine mutti sagt hallo lieber nikolaus
meine schwester sagt den kenn ich das ist onkel klaus
der typ sagt ho ho und packt die geschenke aus
und ich frag mich holt der heut auch seine rute raus
und als ich ihn dann mit der mutti auf ihr zimmer gehen seh dann tut das weh
die wahrheit tut immer weh
ich hasse diesen typen und ich wünsche ihm die pest
ich wünsch mir ne stille nacht und euchn frohes fest

ich glaub ich mach mir erstmal eine flasche auf
weil ich am heilig abend immer einen sauf
um zwanzig uhr schaue ich die tagesschau
ich habe keine kinder ich hab keine frau
den ganzen tag hör ich kein ton von meinem telefon
an meiner klingel klingelt keiner mir egal ich kenn das schon
die glotze läuft doch in der bude ist es still
weil wieder mal keiner mit mir heilig abend feiern will
auf der fensterbank steht mein plastiktannenbaum
und in meinem schrank stapelweise nackte fraun
ich schalt um auf die privaten weil da was geht
und spiel so lang an mir rum bis er mir steht
von der firma flasche sekt und von der mutti ein paar kohlen
geh ich jetzt in die stadt und lass mir einen runterholen
ich brauch jetzt eine die mit sich alles machen läßt
und ich machs ohne - frohes fest

jetzt steh ich hier und habn roten mantel an
in ein paar minuten bin ich mit dem auftritt dran
mit der blöden mütze und dem bart im gesicht
bin ich mir ziemlich sicher erkennt mich mein neffe nicht
ich steh kaum in der tür kommt mir mein bruder entgegen
kommen werd ich später doch es kommt mir sehr gelegen
denn ich weiß in seiner ehe geht schon lang nichts mehr
und deshalb stoß ich ab und zu mal seine alte her
die will das und ich weiß das die istn geiles luder
und ich geb es ihr viel besser als mein bruder
alles was er wollte hat er damals schon bekommen
mir hat niemand was gegeben außer ich habs mir genommen
aber heute ist die nacht da zahl ichs allen heim
denn ich hab die scheiß familie für mich ganz allein
und nach der mutter geb ich dann auch noch der tochter den rest
die brauch das die ist fast zwölf - frohes fest

mein dealer freut sich daß ich an der nadel häng
mir ist das scheißegal das seh ich nicht so eng
die kohlen für den stoff verdien ich aufm strich
warum ich das so mach daß weiß ich selber nicht
wo komm ich her wo geh ich hin das hat doch alles keinen sinn
freie tage feiertage sind für mich nicht drin
ich mach die beine breit für geld auch am fest der liebe
und befriedige damit ungehemmte männertriebe
wenn ich mir was spritze dann will das keiner sehn
doch der hat einen sitzen und auch noch einen stehn
manche denken sicherlich ich wäre kerngesund
manchen mach ichs mit der hand und manchen mit dem mund
doch der typ der wollte für zweihundert mark
mit allem und vor allem ohne fand er stark
und dabei war ich letzte woche erst beim test
und wie war er - positiv - frohes fest


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Old 12-24-2003, 05:45 AM   #87
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Christmas in Hollis by Run DMC

It was December 24th on Hollis Ave in the dark
When I see a man chilling with his dog in the park
I approached very slowly with my heart full of fear
Looked at his dog, oh my God, an ill reindeer
But then I was illin because the man had a beard
And a bag full of goodies, 12 o'clock had neared
So I turned my head a second and the man had gone
But he left his driver's wallet smack dead on the lawn
I picket the wallet up then I took a pause
Took out the license and it cold said "Santa Claus"
A million dollars in it, cold hundreds of G's
Enough to buy a boat and matching car with ease
But I'd never steal from Santa, cause that ain't right
So I'm going home to mail it back to him that night
But when I got home I bugged, cause under the tree
Was a letter from Santa and all the dough was for me

It's Christmas time in Hollis Queens
Mom's cooking chicken and collard greens
Rice and stuffing, macaroni and cheese
And Santa put gifts under Christmas trees
Decorate the house with lights at night
Snow's on the ground, snow white so bright
In the fireplace is the yule log
Beneath the mistle toe as we drink egg nog
The rhymes you hear are the rhymes of Darryl's
But each and every year we bust Chrsitmas carrols

Rhymes so loud and proud you hear it
It's Christmas time and we got the spirit
Jack Frost chillin, the chorus is out
And that's what Christmas is all about
The time is now, the place is here
And the whole wide world is filled with cheer

My name's D.M.C. with the mic in my hand
And I'm chilling and coolin just like a snowman
So open your eyes, lend us an ear
We want to say Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 12-24-2003, 11:12 PM   #88
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Post Christmas

(Nothing to see here.)
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Old 12-24-2003, 11:23 PM   #89
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Down in the workshop all the elves were makin' toys
For the good Gentile girls, and the good Gentile boys
When the boss busted in, nearly scared 'em half to death,
Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath,
From his beard to his boots he was covered with ammo,
Like a big fat drunk disgruntled Yuletide Rambo,
And he smiled as he said with a twinkle in his eye,
"Merry Christmas to all - now you're all gonna die!"

The night Santa went crazy
The night St. Nick went insane
Realized he'd been gettin' a raw deal
Something finally must have snapped in his brain...

Well, the workshop is gone now, he decided to bomb it
Everywhere you'll find pieces of Cupid and Comet
And he tied up his helpers and he held the elves hostage
And he ground up poor Rudolph into reindeer sausage
He got Dancer and Prancer with an old German Luger
And he slashed up Dasher just like Freddy Krueger
And he picked up a flamethrower and he barbequed Blitzen
And he took a big bite and said, "It tastes just like chicken!"

The night Santa went crazy
The night Kris Kringle went nuts
Now you can't hardly walk around the North Pole
Without steppin' in reindeer guts

There's the National Guard and the F.B.I.
There's a van from the Eyewitness News
And helicopters circlin' 'round in the sky
And the bullets are flyin', the body count's risin'
And everyone's dyin' to know, oh Santa, why?
My my my my my my
You used to be such a jolly guy....

Yes, Virginia, now Santa's doin' time
In a federal prison for his infamous crime
Hey, little friend, now don't you cry no more tears
He'll be out with good behavior in 700 more years
But now Vixen's in therapy and Donner's still nervous
And the elves all got jobs working for the postal service
And they say Mrs. Clause, she's on the phone every night
With her lawyer negotiating the movie rights

They're talkin' bout - the night Santa went crazy
The night St. Nicholas flipped
Broke his back for some milk and cookies
Sounds to me like he was tired of gettin' gypped

Wo, the night Santa went crazy
The night St. Nick went insane
Realized he's gettin' a raw deal
Something finally must have snapped in his brain
Wo, something finally must have snapped in his brain
Tell ya, something finally must have snapped... in his brain........


"Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy." -- George Carlin
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Old 12-26-2003, 01:09 AM   #90
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TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS, HE LIVED ALL ALONE, IN A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE MADE OF PLASTER AND STONE. I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE, AND TO SEE JUST WHO IN THIS HOME DID LIVE. I LOOKED ALL ABOUT, A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE, NO TINSEL, NO PRESENTS, NOT EVEN A TREE. NO STOCKING BY MANTLE, JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND, ON THE WALL HUNG PICTURES OF FAR DISTANT LANDS. WITH MEDALS AND BADGES, AWARDS OF ALL KINDS, A SOBER THOUGHT CAME THROUGH MY MIND. FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT, IT WAS DARK AND DREARY, I FOUND THE HOME OF A SOLDIER, ONCE I COULD SEE CLEARLY. THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING, SILENT, ALONE, CURLED UP ON THE FLOOR IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME. THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE, THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER, NOT HOW I PICTURED A UNITED STATES SOLDIER. WAS THIS THE HERO OF WHOM I'D JUST READ? CURLED UP ON A PONCHO, THE FLOOR FOR A BED? I REALIZED THE FAMILIES THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT, OWED THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT. SOON ROUND THE WORLD, THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY, AND GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY. THEY ALL ENJOYED FREEDOM EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR, BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS, LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE. I COULDN'T HELP WONDER HOW MANY LAY ALONE, ON A COLD CHRISTMAS EVE IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME. THE VERY THOUGHT BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE, I DROPPED TO MY KNEES AND STARTED TO CRY. THE SOLDIER AWAKENED AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE, "SANTA DON'T CRY, THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE; I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM, I DON'T ASK FOR MORE, MY LIFE IS MY GOD, MY COUNTRY, M! Y CORPS." THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER AND DRIFTED TO SLEEP, I COULDN'T CONTROL IT, I CONTINUED TO WEEP. I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS, SO SILENT AND STILL AND WE BOTH SHIVERED FROM THE COLD NIGHT'S CHILL. I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE ON THAT COLD, DARK NIGHT, THIS GUARDIAN OF HONOR SO WILLING TO FIGHT. THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER, WITH A VOICE SOFT AND PURE, WHISPERED, "CARRY ON SANTA, IT'S CHRISTMAS DAY, ALL IS SECURE." ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH, AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT. "MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT."

(got that off of a messege someone put up on army.mil)


Battle is a pure form of expression. It is heart and discipline, reduced to movement and motion. In battle, the words are swept away, giving way to actions-- mercy, sacrifice, anger, fear. These are pure moments of expression.
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Old 12-26-2003, 09:38 AM   #91
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Cool Guy Ho' ho' ho'...

Let's review. In my press release on the last page, Santa was a captured Iraqi fugitive, in Jared's poem he makes the bodies hit the floor (so to speak) and in Rogue15's he visits the house of an impoverished veteran, then takes off without leaving a measley present...

Fear not. Next year, I, the *Easter Bunny,* will be conducting Christmas. Right now Santa's staring at a poster of Gerorge W. Bush at Guantanamo Bay naval base. Justice, and death to the glitter-façade stoolie face man for the greedhead corporate conspiracy!
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Old 12-27-2003, 10:18 PM   #92
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Name that tune

"Know me broken by my master
Teach thee on child of love hereafter

Into the flood again
Same old trip it was back then
So I made a big mistake
Try to see it once my way"


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 12-27-2003, 10:45 PM   #93
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Post Beeznatch

Gee, I have no idea...
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Old 12-28-2003, 01:27 AM   #94
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now its your turn, silly


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 12-28-2003, 01:43 AM   #95
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Cool Guy Prophecy?

'They do not know what lies ahead,
When sun has failed and moon is dead...'

?

?!?

?
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Old 12-28-2003, 06:24 AM   #96
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thats Gollum

I'm going to see Return of the King tomorrow, I can't wait.




"I once had a girl,
Or should I say
She once had me.
She showed me her room,
Isn’t it good?"


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 12-28-2003, 08:16 AM   #97
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Post Lyricism

(The answer.)

Here are some disturbing thoughts:

'I think I'm burning up inside...
I think I'll take a little ride!
I'm gonna light up everything in sight!
I'll drive down to your yard,
And throw a molotov cocktail at your car--
Then another one in the local bar...!'


Who penned 'em?

Gollum it was who uttered the words of wisdom in my preceding post. They did such a good job with him in the Two Towers that he's rapidly becoming my favorite Tolkien character. Naturally, I must invite him to a debate.

Odd Movie Philosopher's Roundabout (an RFS production)

Zoom: Gentlemen, welcome to our roundabout. Tonight's topic: is man naturally evil or naturally good?

Yoda: Hmm. An interesting question, this. Sure you are he must be one or the other?

Gollum: Aaaaaugh! Where are we, precious? Tricksy rabbit has kidnapped us--!

Captain Jack: This isn't Shanghai?

Neo: Well, I got here by following the white rabbit.

Zoom: Didn't think I was real, did you? Gentlemen, I've beamed you all here into cyberspace by virtue of sheer mental discipline so we may have a unique discussion. Gollum, here is a plate of freshly dead fishes to reward your discomfort.

Captain Jack: No worries, then. You also brought rum! Captain Jack Sparrow is on board.

Gollum: Fishes? Nice, tastey...but rabbitses are crunchable!

Yoda: Gollum's nature, evil it is.

Neo: How can you know? Maybe his program was just written that way...

Zoom: I guess that's one way of putting it.

Gollum: No, no...Smeagol is good. Smeagol be nice to tricksy rabbit, but rabbit takes him to someplace far away, gives him plate of make-believe fishes. Bah!

Captain Jack: Well, the rum's real. Cheers!

Yoda: Some are good, and some are evil...that is the way of things.

Zoom: Well, I'm disappointed to hear you say that, Yoda. Of all of tonight's guests, I expected you most of all to pick up on the basic fact that good and evil are subjective valuations made by an observer about a subject rather than an intrinsic property of the subject itself. At the material level, there is no such thing as good and evil--those only come into play when an intelligence perceives them and makes its own judgement call.

Neo: Whoa.

Zoom: That reminds me. Has it occured to you yet that you're just a computer program?

Captain Jack: I don't understand one word of this, but the rum is good. Cheers!

Gollum: Nasty, tricksy rabbit tries to confuse us...false!

Yoda: Hmm...tricksy the rabbit is.








'Pretty swallow, cut open the dawn so the sun may rise on this day.'
--Some long-eared freak with a sword

See my sword collection

Last edited by Zoom Rabbit; 12-28-2003 at 09:31 AM.
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Old 12-28-2003, 03:19 PM   #98
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Watch yourself there, pal... doesn't Gollum catch and eat rabbits raw?


Native XWA.Netter (Nutter?)
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Old 12-28-2003, 07:07 PM   #99
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Or does he????

-------------------------------------------

*A cliff, close to where Frodo and Sam are resting. Gollum wanders along*

Smeagol: What's thissss, preciousss? Nice rabbitsess. Can Smeagol say hello, preciousss?

Gollum: Suppose so, my love. But they might be trickssie, like the Fat Hobbit

Rabbit 1#: I can't take it anymore! *Jumps*

Rabbit2#: Goodbye cruel world *Also jumps*

Gollum: See, people would rather jump off a cliff than be friends with you!

Smeagol: Deac likes us! Deac is our friend!

Gollum: Well, we takes the rabbits back to Fat Hobbit for food, but as for Deac, preciousss

*Deac is pushed off the cliff*


Deac: Purveyor of Fine Quality Postage Since 2001
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Old 12-29-2003, 12:50 AM   #100
Redwing
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Seen RotK last night. WOO!

In the spirit of Ike's badgers, may I present: scampi


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Old 12-29-2003, 01:10 AM   #101
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Cool Guy Neo Rio Speedos

Edlib: This excerpt from the previous page should describe precisely where I stand on Gollum and *rabbitses.*

Gollum: It's...it's rabbitses, yes? Precious? Isss it...crunchety?

Zoom: Not this rabbit. You remember 'Sting?' Well, this is a samurai sword, and it makes Sting look like a bilbo. We have river folk back where I come from, so I came prepared.




Deac: Precisely. Rabbitses are much too fast for poor Gollum to catch fair and square...

Redwing: Meh. Badgers are still #1. However, yours is somewhat better than this one.


Last edited by Zoom Rabbit; 12-29-2003 at 01:40 AM.
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Old 12-29-2003, 01:34 AM   #102
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Red face Is THIS my hand?!?... Is this MY hand?!?... Is this my HAND?!?... IS this...

Quote:
Originally posted by Zoom Rabbit
Edlib: This excerpt from the previous page...
PREVIOUS PAGE?!? You don't truly expect me to remember that far back, do you?!? A whole page? FERGAWDSAKES!!! What do think I am, a COMPUTER?!?

Yeah,.. I musta missed that one somehow... But then, after all, I've been living in an egg-nog and Nyqil induced semi-conscious haze for most of the last month... my, uh... whatchamacall'em,.. my neurons aren't what they were even 3 weeks ago.

So my brain-cells are feeling a wee bit mushy at the moment... But I don't believe there has been any lasting, permanent damage done to my woolen purple banana engine blasting-cap.



Native XWA.Netter (Nutter?)
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Old 12-29-2003, 10:14 PM   #103
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Re: Lyricism

Quote:
Originally posted by Zoom Rabbit
'I think I'm burning up inside...
I think I'll take a little ride!
I'm gonna light up everything in sight!
I'll drive down to your yard,
And throw a molotov cocktail at your car--
Then another one in the local bar...!'
That's one of the best Offspring songs ever... It's made every driving mix tape/cd I've ever made.

But for sheer disturbology, nothing beats Beheaded.


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Old 12-30-2003, 12:56 AM   #104
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Quote:
Originally posted by Redwing


In the spirit of Ike's badgers, may I present: scampi


I often see Kuala Lampur trying to disguise themselves as France, the bastards.


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 12-30-2003, 06:03 AM   #105
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Cool Guy Leon Russel's swizzle stick collection

Edlib: No sick...baaa-aaad!

(Get well soon.)

Kylilin: Looks like the pirate netted your fish, eh? Never fear...here are some more lyrics to work on:

Laugh and say I'm green,
I've seen things you'll never see.
Talk behind my back,
But I'm off the beaten track.
I'll take on anyone!
Ain't scared of a bloody nose,
Drink till I drop down
With one eye on my clothes.

What is it? I'll take it.
Who is she? I'll rape it.
Got a bet there? I'll meet it.
Getting High? You can't beat it.


'Pretty swallow, cut open the dawn so the sun may rise on this day.'
--Some long-eared freak with a sword

See my sword collection
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Old 12-30-2003, 06:08 AM   #106
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I'll see your Doctor Jimmy by The who and raise you:

Hey my friend
It seems your eyes are troubled
Care to share your times with me
Would you say you're feeling low and so
A good idea would be to get it off your mind

See, you and me
Have a better time than most can dream
Have it better than the best
And so can pull on through
Whatever tears at us
Whatever holds us down
And if nothing can be done
We'll make the best of what's around


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 12-30-2003, 03:17 PM   #107
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Re: Leon Russel's swizzle stick collection

Quote:
Originally posted by Zoom Rabbit
Edlib: No sick...baaa-aaad!
(Get well soon.)
I never said I was sick! I just love the taste of a eggnog and Nyqil cocktail... Yummeh!



Actually the cold is gone,.. but I must have pulled a muscle from coughing so much, and now I have a sharp pain in my side, like someone jabbing me in the ribs with an icepick everytime I cough,.. sneeze,.. breathe...

Fun.


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Old 12-30-2003, 06:45 PM   #108
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to quote Dennis Leary:

"Nyquil, Nyquil, Nyquil, we love you, you giant f***in Q"


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 12-30-2003, 10:33 PM   #109
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Cool Guy Blue fog

Edlib: You don't have a pulled muscle, man! We got you a voodoo doll for Christmas. Suprise!

I think Nitro has it now. Or something.

Kylilin: Dave Matthews Band--'The Best of What's Around.'

My next submission to the lyrics game is a trick question...

'Pop-up daddy, you suck!
You want my attention? Good luck!
'Cause I'm gonna cut your head off--whee, yeah!
You'll love my cutting head off, you betcha!'


?

??
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Old 12-31-2003, 01:38 AM   #110
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Eh,.. if you guys had a voodoo doll of me I'm sure the pain would be much worse,.. and lower.

But the thought of Nitro handling anything that's supposed to be representative of my body gives me shudders,.. and the hives.

So it works, in that regard...



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Old 12-31-2003, 02:36 AM   #111
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My Turn?

Quote:
Originally posted by Zoom Rabbit
Leon Russel's swizzle stick collection
I see someone else watches Las Vegas

Designate someone other than me,
I'm so drunk I can hardly see,
Another shot of Jager and I turn the key,
I got so many places to be!


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Old 01-02-2004, 08:50 AM   #112
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Exclamation Nonrelevancy interrelated

Nitro: What's really a mind-blower is that I've never seen Las Vegas, or been there even.

'Leon Russel's swizzle stick collection' was just what popped into my head as I was staring at the empty subject bar...

Last edited by Zoom Rabbit; 01-02-2004 at 09:09 PM.
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Old 01-04-2004, 06:13 AM   #113
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Re: Blue fog

Quote:
Originally posted by Zoom Rabbit


'Pop-up daddy, you suck!
You want my attention? Good luck!
'Cause I'm gonna cut your head off--whee, yeah!
You'll love my cutting head off, you betcha!'


?

??
ummm...yeah

but I'll take my turn anyway

"There've been times in my life,
I've been wonderin' why.
Still, somehow I believed we'd always survive.
Now, I'm not so sure
You're waiting here, one good reason to try
But, what more can I say? What's left to provide?"


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 01-08-2004, 03:55 AM   #114
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Exclamation THINGS THAT I HOLD TO BE TRUE

Here is a semi-random list of things that life has taught me. You may not agree with any of them, or even find some of them completely contradictory. Fine. You are free to feel that... but it changes nothing. My brain has chosen to accept these things as part of the driving principles upon which I base by existance, and will never be waivered.
ENJOY!


Pizza must be eaten fresh and piping hot, straight from the oven and able to burn the roof of your mouth,.. or the next morning straight out of the box from the fridge, cold and congealed. In no other state is it ever any good... and trying to reheat it doesn't work. The same goes for most Chinese food...

Everybody thinks the music they listened to as a kid and young adult is the only music that was ever any good. The older you get, the worse new music sounds.

Women are never as impressed with a man's car as much as guys think (or wish) they are.

Here's my rule of thumb concerning packaged foods:
If the food you are about to eat comes in a box or a can, has a picture of the prepared food of the front with the words "serving suggestion" nearby, plus it also has the cooking directions listed in a panel on the side: IT IS NOT GOOD FOR YOU!!! No matter what it says on the box by way of "Healthy"

Nothing sold for $19.95 as a "limited offer only on TV" will ever work the way it was promised.

Practically every woman on Earth looks sexy in black fishnet. I don't know why this is, but experience tells me it's true.

Nobody ever really wants to hear the details about your sex-life or your bowel movements. And nobody cares to listen to how drunk you were last night either.

E-mail spam must work well enough for someone to make a profit, otherwise they would have stopped trying a long time ago. You will never find anyone willing to admit to ordering anything that way however.

The later you leave for work the more hassle your commute is going to be. This is not because the trip is any worse than most days, but because your perception is that you will never make it on time and that any delay, no matter how minor, will seem like a big deal, and you will end up acting like a rude jerk to your fellow commuters (who also most likely did not leave themselves enough time and are returning the favor back to you.)

There is never any good reason not to take a nap, (with perhaps the sole exeption being if you are currently driving.)

The scariest thing in the world is a large, well organized goup of people united behind a common goal, no matter how noble that goal might seem when you are part of the group. A strong personality can sell ideas to a group like this that would be laughed at with scorn by a single individual of that same group if it were presented to them alone in the harsh light of day. individual intellegence, logic and reasoning drop exponentially with the size of a group, and degree of organization.

More to come as they surface out of the bubbling sludge that is my mind... maybe...


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Old 01-08-2004, 11:12 AM   #115
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Play with the rabbit.


Being human totally sucks most of the time.
Videogames are the only thing that
make life bearable.
- Anorak's Almanac, Chapter 91, Verses 1-2

Add me on: XBL | PSN | Last.fm | Steam
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Old 01-08-2004, 12:53 PM   #116
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oh well, edlib.. i fully accept and support your list here, as long as we talk about the points 1, 3, 4, 5, 6, 8, 9, 11 .. points 2, 7 an 10 need a more detailed definition to be accepted by my brain..


point 2 - there is actually 1 good on 10000 really really bad 'new muzac' tracks.

point 7 - sex details might be interesting IF there is additional video, audio or picturing material. otherwise nothing of the "massive and exhausing" sex event might be true and therefore not worth hearing. bowel movements are bowel movements. it moves and that's it. nothing to talk about. except for "i took my fist and 'moved' his bowels." .. but then again there is a need for some multimedia proof. telling someone how drunk you were always ends up in getting told how drunk someone was. it's like comparing cars.. boring conversation.

point 10 - good reasons not to take a nap:
1. you are driving by public transportation services and the vehicle is complete crowded with strange looking people who stare at you.
2. you are driving as passenger with your friend who has complete no sense of orientation, you are hungry and your girlfriend is waiting at home, on the bed complete with a tasty meal. also she might have got out the video cam already (see point 7).
3. mash is on tv.
these example lead to the conclusion that except for extremely dangerous or joyous ones there is never any good reason not to take a nap.

also i'd like to add the following:

if you have to make a decision and in that same second where you recognize that, you get the idea how to decide, dont review this thought. just follow it exactly. any other decision made after this is complete "wrong" and may result in desaster or at least in the fact that you stand in the slowest line at the supermarket.

..
..

wow, man.. we could be brothers, eyh?
so tell me from could-be-brother to could-be-brother (and to our hearers of course) .. is all that hair implanted?


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Old 01-08-2004, 07:08 PM   #117
Kylilin
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things that edlib holds to be true that I agree with

Quote:
Originally posted by edlib


Pizza must be eaten fresh and piping hot, straight from the oven and able to burn the roof of your mouth,.. or the next morning straight out of the box from the fridge, cold and congealed. In no other state is it ever any good... and trying to reheat it doesn't work. The same goes for most Chinese food...

Everybody thinks the music they listened to as a kid and young adult is the only music that was ever any good. The older you get, the worse new music sounds.

Women are never as impressed with a man's car as much as guys think (or wish) they are.

Here's my rule of thumb concerning packaged foods:
If the food you are about to eat comes in a box or a can, has a picture of the prepared food of the front with the words "serving suggestion" nearby, plus it also has the cooking directions listed in a panel on the side: IT IS NOT GOOD FOR YOU!!! No matter what it says on the box by way of "Healthy"

Nothing sold for $19.95 as a "limited offer only on TV" will ever work the way it was promised.

Practically every woman on Earth looks sexy in black fishnet. I don't know why this is, but experience tells me it's true.

Nobody ever really wants to hear the details about your sex-life or your bowel movements. And nobody cares to listen to how drunk you were last night either.

E-mail spam must work well enough for someone to make a profit, otherwise they would have stopped trying a long time ago. You will never find anyone willing to admit to ordering anything that way however.

The later you leave for work the more hassle your commute is going to be. This is not because the trip is any worse than most days, but because your perception is that you will never make it on time and that any delay, no matter how minor, will seem like a big deal, and you will end up acting like a rude jerk to your fellow commuters (who also most likely did not leave themselves enough time and are returning the favor back to you.)

The scariest thing in the world is a large, well organized goup of people united behind a common goal, no matter how noble that goal might seem when you are part of the group. A strong personality can sell ideas to a group like this that would be laughed at with scorn by a single individual of that same group if it were presented to them alone in the harsh light of day. individual intellegence, logic and reasoning drop exponentially with the size of a group, and degree of organization.

The Pizza one is definately the most important one, I can't stand a slics of lukewarm, droopy, squishy crusted pizza.

Quote:
There is never any good reason not to take a nap, (with perhaps the sole exeption being if you are currently driving.)
This one I do not agree with at all. Taking a nap when you are sick as a dog is perfectly acceptable.


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 01-08-2004, 07:42 PM   #118
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I have a pizza place near me where the pizza tastes great when you get it (of course after its ready), and it's even great left over too ^_^

hell, i gave a left over slice to someone whom i know who's a fresh-freak (everything he eats has to be freshly made), he loved it, and it sat out all night! =D (well in the fridge)

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Old 01-08-2004, 11:08 PM   #119
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Re: things that edlib holds to be true that I agree with

Quote:
Originally posted by Kylilin
This one I do not agree with at all. Taking a nap when you are sick as a dog is perfectly acceptable.
Read it again... it's a double negative. I am a firm believer in napping. In fact, I can't think of a reason not to take one when you feel you need one. Napping takes all piority.
I can nap when other people are driving, I have napped on public transportation, and I occasionally nap at work (fortunately my job often allows me enough down-time and freedom to pull this off.)


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Old 01-13-2004, 06:12 AM   #120
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oopsy, I misread. My bad.


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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