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Old 02-03-2009, 05:14 PM   #2041
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No, but it is possible to prepare German Lager in the style of English tea.

Is the Baroque style really dead?






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Old 02-04-2009, 12:37 AM   #2042
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Quite.

Why is it that every girl I like has a boyfriend and every guy I like is straight?

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Old 02-04-2009, 12:41 AM   #2043
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Because....EVERYONE HAS PARTICIPATED IN A CONSPIRACY AGAINST YOU!!!!!

I wonder...is it possible to create a virtual reality game similar to that of the matrix and still prevent some sort of evil force from taking it over??


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If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 02-04-2009, 12:52 AM   #2044
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Yes, just tack the Three Laws in.

Do you know what they are?

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Old 02-04-2009, 01:02 AM   #2045
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Why of course! 1. Be nice 2: Protect, but still be nice 3. Eat, Drink, and be Merry

That is so easy!


Is it possible to create an AI that would not be born with that murderous humanistic trait of robots?


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Old 02-04-2009, 10:31 AM   #2046
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Yes, give it the personality of Charlie Brown.

If the world communicated in non-sequiturs, would everyone be smarter?


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Old 02-04-2009, 10:58 AM   #2047
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Nope, we'd be so busy with non-sequiturs that we'd forget everything else and eventually die off.

If dogs had voice boxes, would they still be our best friend?


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Old 02-04-2009, 09:26 PM   #2048
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I thought they did.

Does anyone here know what the real Three Laws of Robotics are?

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Old 02-04-2009, 11:34 PM   #2049
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Yes. Asimov's Three Laws are:

1. Bump into things.
2. Make Whirring sounds
3. Shoot green lightsaber at a Jedi attempting to free his friends from the clutches of a Vile Hutt.

If cats could talk, would they use the word "purrrr-fect" ?

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Old 02-05-2009, 10:29 AM   #2050
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Only during sex.

What does the scroll lock button do?


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Old 02-05-2009, 10:42 AM   #2051
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It locks a scroll to your face, duh!

What does Caps lock do?


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Old 02-05-2009, 04:54 PM   #2052
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It summons the evil monkey from out of your cloest.

Why is it whenever I stub my toe, I am doomed to repeat this throughout the day/week?


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Old 02-05-2009, 05:03 PM   #2053
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Because, after stubbing, your toe becomes attracted to objects that will hurt it.

I wonder, if Albert Einstein were still around today to see all of our scientific advancements, would he comment on modern day pies?


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If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 02-05-2009, 11:41 PM   #2054
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There'd be more interesting things to comment on.

Does the phrase "Let's make sex" make you sound like an idiot, someone with bad English, or both?

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Old 02-05-2009, 11:47 PM   #2055
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Both, idiots and bad English are a combination that cannot be seperated...or avoided.

WHAT IS THE REASON FOR THIS MADNESS!!??


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Old 02-05-2009, 11:50 PM   #2056
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Diego Varen got bored with the Avatar/Signature Above You thread.

If the sister is named Denise, is the brother named Deneffew?


Quote:
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Old 02-05-2009, 11:54 PM   #2057
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Of course!! But that matters on Denise's middle name, if it is Cloris, the Brother may be Grekelzog, if it's George, it'll be Denefew...and so and so forth...

If I tripped on a log, would there be a rock behind me?


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Old 02-06-2009, 12:19 PM   #2058
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Hopefully, because it would mean that there's probably not a rock in front of you.

If someone confused "nearly" and "barely" in a conversation, would it confuse you?


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Old 02-06-2009, 12:22 PM   #2059
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No, but it is human nature to confuse words, I would be confused though if he mixed up 'nearly' with 'nearly,' though....oy

If I tripped in a stairwell, would gravity propel me over the side of the railing, or out the nearby window?


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Old 02-06-2009, 12:24 PM   #2060
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barely.

Who'd win in a fight. A horde of angry fleas or a horde of lazy bees?

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Old 02-06-2009, 12:29 PM   #2061
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A horde of angry fleas, of course!!! Have you ever seen what they can do to a human? Have you seen the destruction that I've seen!!! OH THE HORROR!!

Would an angry viking from Scandinavia be able to beat an over-weight Aztec in a drinking game?


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If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 02-06-2009, 02:37 PM   #2062
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Probably.

What's heavier, a tonne of feathers, or a tonne of bricks?

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Old 02-06-2009, 04:58 PM   #2063
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Neither, I choose option C, a tonne of nothing.

Is it possible to pack a tonne of feathers in a backpack and then hike 20 miles?


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If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 02-06-2009, 05:50 PM   #2064
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No.

Should I be so abrupt?

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Old 02-06-2009, 05:54 PM   #2065
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No, abruptness summons the dark forces of the corrector, who will soon correct your apparent lack of grammar by...erm....brain surgery.

Is abruptness the key to immortality?


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Old 02-06-2009, 06:44 PM   #2066
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They key to immortality is flossing in-between meals.

If you throw a baseball into a glass house, will you hear it?


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Old 02-06-2009, 06:59 PM   #2067
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No, everyone else will though.

If there is a cat flying through the air, would I be looking for the thrower?


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Old 02-06-2009, 07:56 PM   #2068
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No, you'd been looking for the cat's dysfunctional cousin the dog, who everyone knows is the real culprit.

If a horde of pigeons with diarrhea fly overhead, would you rather be under a poncho or an umbrella?


Quote:
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Old 02-06-2009, 08:13 PM   #2069
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Neither, I'd be carrying a shotgun. They wouldn't poop on me then.

If you're standing under a seagull, would it hold a conversation with the guy next to you?


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Old 02-07-2009, 06:19 AM   #2070
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Only if you made positive comments about its plumage, and backside.

I just gave my girlfriend a 24 carat goldfish necklace. Why isnt she happy damnit?

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Old 02-07-2009, 10:23 AM   #2071
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She's a member or PETA.

I just learned all the elements from the Periodic Table, so why do I still insist that there are only 4?


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Old 02-07-2009, 10:55 AM   #2072
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Becuase technically, you're brain capacity is only able to contain 4.

So, is it possible to create nuclear fission by using the steam coming from a sealed pot?


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Old 02-07-2009, 11:48 AM   #2073
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Depends on what's in the pot.

What, other than water, is in the pot?

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Old 02-07-2009, 12:00 PM   #2074
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Uranium.

Is it possible to use this uranium and turn it into a weapon that I could sell on the Black Market and become known on the international community as the Cook who made Uranium?


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Old 02-07-2009, 12:03 PM   #2075
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Yes, if you want people to eat Uranium.

What are the odds of that?

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Old 02-07-2009, 01:55 PM   #2076
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Odd.

What are the normals of that?


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Old 02-07-2009, 01:57 PM   #2077
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About normal...something like that.

If I ate a yellow flower, would I fail a drug test?


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Old 02-07-2009, 02:08 PM   #2078
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If that yellow flower was from phylum methlabicum, sure.

If I designed, constructed and launched a ship of majestic proportions, is it possible that it may be captained by my horse, Erasmus?

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Old 02-07-2009, 02:08 PM   #2079
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Yes, incredibly wet. Especially inside.

Where is my baggage?

EDIT: Ninja'd by Astro!






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Old 02-07-2009, 02:09 PM   #2080
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Nope, it is somewhere safe....from you...

I wonder, if I built a tank the size of two 5 story buildings and managed to create an engine for it that made it really fast at lesser cost of gas, would this somehow affect the stock market on the other side of the world?


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