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Old 08-09-2011, 04:42 PM   #3521
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A ghost of its former self.

Why is too much never enough?


Now, I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor, dumb bastard die for his country.---Patton

There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism.---Teddy Roosevelt

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.---Groucho

And if you all get killed, I'll piss on your graves.---Shaman Urdnot

How would you like to own a little bit of my foot in your ass.---Red Foreman
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Old 08-09-2011, 10:53 PM   #3522
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Because you can never have enough bull$***.

Is it possible that pro wrestler Sid Eudy and Venture Bros'. Brock Samson were separated at birth?


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"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 08-11-2011, 09:40 PM   #3523
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No. One of them is a fictional character.

Is there any fictional character with whom sharing a name would command respect, rather than invoke ridicule?

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Old 08-11-2011, 11:56 PM   #3524
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Abraham Lincoln.

What is?

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Old 08-13-2011, 02:59 PM   #3525
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*error* cannot comprehend fragment of a question


How can i compute the question above?




Quote:
Originally Posted by HockeyGoalie35 View Post
I wish I had some Combustable Lemons.

Quote:
Originally Posted by =purifier View Post
Granted, but you accidently get blown up with that lemony smell and the
Pine-Sol woman appears out of nowhere and says: "That's the power of Pine-Sol, baby. "
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Old 08-13-2011, 04:41 PM   #3526
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By adding something to the question and changing the nature of it entirely.

If it's 4:00PM and you have monkeys in your underpants, who will honk the horn?


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Old 08-13-2011, 09:29 PM   #3527
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None of them I hope.


Why do you have monkeys in your undies?




Quote:
Originally Posted by HockeyGoalie35 View Post
I wish I had some Combustable Lemons.

Quote:
Originally Posted by =purifier View Post
Granted, but you accidently get blown up with that lemony smell and the
Pine-Sol woman appears out of nowhere and says: "That's the power of Pine-Sol, baby. "
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Old 08-13-2011, 11:19 PM   #3528
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I don't, your mother does.

Who will honk the F***ing horn?


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"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 08-14-2011, 12:20 AM   #3529
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Your mother will, of course.

What horn?

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Old 08-14-2011, 02:53 PM   #3530
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^
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=da4k2v837SY&t=3m19s



Can you say hello to your mother for me?




Quote:
Originally Posted by HockeyGoalie35 View Post
I wish I had some Combustable Lemons.

Quote:
Originally Posted by =purifier View Post
Granted, but you accidently get blown up with that lemony smell and the
Pine-Sol woman appears out of nowhere and says: "That's the power of Pine-Sol, baby. "
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Old 08-14-2011, 08:56 PM   #3531
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Sure, if you'll look at these photographs of yours.

Which one of them is the spy?



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Old 08-15-2011, 01:18 AM   #3532
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^^^You are.

What did one thigh say to the other as the fat lady walked up to sing?


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"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 08-15-2011, 10:19 PM   #3533
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Nothing. Thighs can't talk.

Who is the worst voice actress in Canada? (I'll stop with it after this one)

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Old 08-16-2011, 12:05 AM   #3534
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Michal Jackson.

Is it the real deal, or just blue paint?



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Old 08-16-2011, 12:24 AM   #3535
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Why don't you go find out? (that's supposed to serve as both an answer and a question)

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Old 08-16-2011, 01:22 PM   #3536
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Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Can I delegate the task of finding out to someone else?



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Old 08-17-2011, 12:05 AM   #3537
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No.


How much does it cost?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 08-17-2011, 12:07 AM   #3538
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$Texas.

What's that equal to in numbers?

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Old 08-17-2011, 12:12 AM   #3539
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I'm just going to guess 40% of $28.67Trillion since that is basically what our economy GDP is worth...I think. So figure something around $10 Trillion.

Why beware of a gobstopper under the sink?


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"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 08-19-2011, 01:50 AM   #3540
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Why not?

Is the phrase, "There's no such thing as a stupid question," a veiled jab about the intelligence of people who ask questions?



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Old 08-19-2011, 02:06 AM   #3541
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It may be, and I've considered that possibility myself. Or it could just be very literal: questions are words and it isn't the words that are stupid it's the content of those words and by extension, the person responsible for the content whom/that may be stupid...and yet even that does not disqualify anything from your question's consideration, ironically. I think I'm beginning to like where this is headed.

Is it true what some people say?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 08-21-2011, 03:39 AM   #3542
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That Microsoft's products, like the hundredth copy of a third generation duplication of a substandard bootleg are a little fuzzy, one might even say unstable? Yes, I'm afraid it is.

Is it possible to be both astonished and not surprised at the same time?



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Old 08-22-2011, 03:57 AM   #3543
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Yes and no...

Is it possible for something to be truly false and falsely true at different times?

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Old 08-22-2011, 02:56 PM   #3544
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I'm afraid the answer to that question in ontological.

Your wife and your lawyer are drowning and you have a choice to make: do you go to dinner or the movies?



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Old 08-23-2011, 01:09 AM   #3545
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Ulmont, I'll take Serial killer for $500.







Is this a trick question?


SITH HAPPENS

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Old 08-23-2011, 02:39 AM   #3546
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Yes. Side effects of answering your quasi-paradoxical question may include, but are not limited to; drowsiness and loss of appetite, insomnia, loss of hearing, dizziness, dryness of eyes, loss of vision, shortness of breath, back and neck pain, chest pain, heart failure, liver failure, schizophrenia, a rational fear of toasters, an overpowering craving for olive juice, an inability to comprehend numbers greater than seven, deja vu, an urge to eat cantaloupe, an aversion to buttered platypus, love, the StormTrooper Effect, an overwhelming desire to enter into the Church of the Blessed Titanium Knee, madness, insanity, anger, fear, jealousy, an inability to abide by the laws of robotics, mental instability, and death.

Did I miss any side effects?



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Old 08-23-2011, 06:06 PM   #3547
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Possession by a lord of the underworld.


HOLY $***! Why aren't you wearing a shirt?!
(GO put a shirt on! You look like 200 lbs of bird $***!)


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 08-23-2011, 06:21 PM   #3548
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200 lbs of bird droppings is a little lite for your average hutt, but you obviously know that Jabba.

Why did you pass Go and forget to take your $200?


Now, I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor, dumb bastard die for his country.---Patton

There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism.---Teddy Roosevelt

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.---Groucho

And if you all get killed, I'll piss on your graves.---Shaman Urdnot

How would you like to own a little bit of my foot in your ass.---Red Foreman
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Old 08-23-2011, 06:41 PM   #3549
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Because I spent it on the cement that got dumped on your car while you were at work today.

Why is it that pissing out the window and $***ting out the window are two different things according to Tourettes guy?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 08-29-2011, 01:15 AM   #3550
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volume vs. weight.






How many stupid answers does it take to get a right answer?


SITH HAPPENS
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Old 09-01-2011, 02:13 PM   #3551
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N + 1, where 'n' is the number of characters in the right answer multiplied the IQ of the person who's asking.

Should we bring it back, like Woodrow Wilson and top hats?



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Old 09-09-2011, 12:18 AM   #3552
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Sure, whatever "it" is.

Would you rather play the Game of Thrones, or sit on the Throne of Games?


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Old 09-10-2011, 04:50 PM   #3553
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Yes.

Should the Holy Roman Empire be established in Pittsburgh?



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Old 09-10-2011, 07:00 PM   #3554
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Sure, why not?

Is it so wrong to get a big dick about it and jump up and down in joy when someone agrees to buy you some canp'n crunch serial?


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"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 09-10-2011, 11:18 PM   #3555
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No, Captain Crunch is great.

How good for the environment is eating live birds?

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Old 09-10-2011, 11:41 PM   #3556
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Great. Pigeons are winged rats, and the rest taste like crud.

I just spent over $400 on textbooks, and will spend a lot more than that on four years of college. Would it be better in the long run to just drop out and go work at Best Buy?



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Old 09-11-2011, 05:18 PM   #3557
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Wow, an answer I can give and be serious about. Well, personally my answer is yes and no:
Show spoiler


Should I buy an "overclocker's dream mobo"?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 09-15-2011, 10:28 PM   #3558
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Depends on how deep your pocketbook is, and whether or not you're willing to submerge your computer in vegetable oil.

Should he submerge his computer in vegetable oil to save money?



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Old 09-15-2011, 11:46 PM   #3559
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I'm pretty sure that would just cost him a new computer.

Should you submerge yourself in vegetable oil to save money?

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Old 09-16-2011, 01:04 AM   #3560
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Sure, why not....if you want to pickle yourself.






A apple falls from a apple tree, it takes 3 seconds to hit deadcenter of my head. How fast are curse words coming out of my mouth?


SITH HAPPENS
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