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Old 05-11-2010, 12:37 PM   #561
Holty1-5
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"Then i would do what ever our Great Government asked me too".... There onto me


What if the Government was pure Monkeys

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Old 05-11-2010, 03:15 PM   #562
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Wait....it's not? Oh, that's right, it's pretty much pure jackass right now.

What if the world ran out of ideas?


Now, I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor, dumb bastard die for his country.---Patton

There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism.---Teddy Roosevelt

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.---Groucho

And if you all get killed, I'll piss on your graves.---Shaman Urdnot

How would you like to own a little bit of my foot in your ass.---Red Foreman
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Old 05-11-2010, 04:12 PM   #563
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I think it all ready has so far there on plan ZZY8I - Declare war on Oxygen

What if Earth and the rest of the solar system (- The Sun) Engaged in a Battle to the DEATH?

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Old 05-11-2010, 10:20 PM   #564
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Ah the GLORIOUS ARMAGEDDON!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Holty1-5 View Post
What if the Government was pure Monkeys
If it's anything like the ninja monkey army, I'm afraid the entire world is screwed. There isn't anything even I could do to help.

What if it rained sheet metal ninja stars that read sonofabitch on all of them?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 05-15-2010, 03:40 AM   #565
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It already did, and I'm still pulling them out of my ass.


*ssshhhthrawck!* (SONOFABITCH! Somebody get me the vise-grips...again!)




What if I had - had a gigantic magnet to stop all of those raining sheet metal ninja stars in the first place?


SITH HAPPENS
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Old 05-15-2010, 09:00 AM   #566
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Then Who evers Holding the Magnet is In a Lot of pain soon.


What if does Ninja stars where made of Butter

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Old 05-16-2010, 08:30 PM   #567
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Hmmm..dairy or non dairy? Well anyway, I would need a massive open wheeled tanker to catch them in...and make a profit from going around the country, spraying butter on everyone's food.
*Cha-Ching!*

Note: (Lol! I was going to say "everyone's corn-on-the-cob", but that might get interpreted as meaning something else.



What if it hailed corn cobs afterwards?


SITH HAPPENS
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Old 05-16-2010, 10:58 PM   #568
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We'd adopt that african thing or that jamaican thing where we walk around with baskets on our heads to catch all that food.


What if Jules got caught up in his own "say what again" bit?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 05-18-2010, 01:30 AM   #569
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*Jules picks up the bible, turns to the book of Ezekiel and quotes*........

Ezekiel 25:17
'The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides with the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and good will shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon those with great vengeance and with furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know that my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.....




And GOD STRUCK DOWN ON HIM...BAM, BAM..BAM-BAM-BAM!


What if Jules was to shoot himself for saying "what" for the first gawdamn time?


SITH HAPPENS
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Old 05-20-2010, 11:15 PM   #570
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I'd lol.


What if Darth Zavier really was a cover for that guy who got his picture taken at the end of a driveway next to a giant furby?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 05-20-2010, 11:57 PM   #571
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Then the furby's reading all of this right now.

What if GTA:SWcity had no delusions of grandeur?

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Old 05-21-2010, 12:17 AM   #572
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Then I would be doing something else instead.

(BTW I do have a fair bit of evidence to support that! )
What if next February I had another chick avatar and tried to dupe another n00b?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 05-23-2010, 05:00 PM   #573
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*ahem!* You ever see the movie "Joy Ride" GTA, oh yeah...you do that.




What if GTA did dupe another noob in February on the internet, which turned out to be a physco trucker, and this guy was to persistently hunt GTA down because of it; along with a bottle of pink champagne.


SITH HAPPENS
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Old 05-23-2010, 06:52 PM   #574
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Then he'll be sorry once he meets me in person b/c psychos are what I specialize in beating down and impaling.

What if your home was invaded by thousands of male cats that wanted to do the "dancing tail" wherever they felt like?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 05-23-2010, 07:20 PM   #575
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Two words for ya: Cat stew.

What if you met your doppleganger tomorrow?


Now, I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor, dumb bastard die for his country.---Patton

There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism.---Teddy Roosevelt

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.---Groucho

And if you all get killed, I'll piss on your graves.---Shaman Urdnot

How would you like to own a little bit of my foot in your ass.---Red Foreman
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Old 05-23-2010, 07:45 PM   #576
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It better not be anything like the one on CastleVania 3.

What if they now made Tobacco Sauce?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 05-23-2010, 08:12 PM   #577
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Well then it would be Smooookin' hot!




What if someone on LF slam their nuts in a car door?


SITH HAPPENS
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Old 05-25-2010, 06:55 PM   #578
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Oww. Actually I sorta did that but in opposite order, I slammed the car door into my junk because I opened it too fast and wasn't wearing a jockstrap. Not half as bad as one skateboarder guy I saw that ali jumped, landed the board on the handrail, ground his board, board caught, he slipped and fell onto a railing--on his crotch, slid down it forward, bumped off where the handrail curve ended flat, and then landed face first in the concrete. I'm not squeamish and that hurt me just to watch...and it hurt me again to recall just now...

What if that crazy old man that makes rockets out of aluminum trash cans was back on TV?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 05-25-2010, 09:16 PM   #579
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Then we'd know something about GTA's television habits.

What if rabbits were as deadly as the one in MP & the Holy Grail?


Now, I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor, dumb bastard die for his country.---Patton

There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism.---Teddy Roosevelt

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.---Groucho

And if you all get killed, I'll piss on your graves.---Shaman Urdnot

How would you like to own a little bit of my foot in your ass.---Red Foreman
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Old 05-26-2010, 05:03 PM   #580
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I would train them for ultimate combat and then send them out to destroy GTA's "Ninja Monkey Army" oh yeah! Because you see, they have these nasty long looking teeth like this *holds two fingers pointing downward from mouth* - thath wial wripth ya headth offth *ahem* excuse me - and can leap tall knights in a single bound.



What if you got caught by the Jabberwocky, and it decided to make you it's loooove slave.


SITH HAPPENS
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Old 05-26-2010, 10:03 PM   #581
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It just so happens I carry a disease painfully and instantly debilitating for their kind. The rest of your sick fantasy is denied.

What if Hacksaw Jim Duggan needed a tag team partner?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 05-27-2010, 12:28 PM   #582
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Then its about time he and Christain got more Gold

What if Randy Orton RKO'd your Entire Family?

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Old 05-28-2010, 04:07 AM   #583
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He'd meet my variant of Emerald Fusion on the steel grill entrance ramp.

What if Rien from Genesis Wars 3 had an evil twin counterpart IRL at a cosplay?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 06-06-2010, 12:36 AM   #584
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Nothing, because I have no idea what you are talking about? :P

What if we were burnt by ice and frozen by fire?
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Old 06-06-2010, 03:29 AM   #585
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Nothing would change. I still avoid both.

What if we were blue skinned humanoids who lived in primitive jungle societies?

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Old 06-06-2010, 12:28 PM   #586
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THE SMURFS!!! Or did you mean the Na'vi? Same thing, anyway... ones just alot taller...

What if all the mods/admins got banned from LF? CHAOS!!!
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Old 06-06-2010, 12:51 PM   #587
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Then We could post what we want when we want

What if You were a Admin?

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Old 06-06-2010, 12:54 PM   #588
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You'd be my first victim.

What if everyone had Admin rights?

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Old 06-06-2010, 01:24 PM   #589
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Then No one would be Special

What if it instead of Christmas we had Springmas

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Old 06-06-2010, 06:45 PM   #590
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No matter what Santa wore it'd be wrong...well except maybe biker's clothes. Actually, I know a few bikers and ex bikers that could play Santa.


What if the only way to get lucky with her: was to eat pellets of caustic soda.


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 06-06-2010, 07:12 PM   #591
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Well that would suck because I probably wouldn't be feeling up to getting lucky afterwards, if I was still alive.




What if a tornado, despite your geographical location, ripped-up your town, community, suburb, wherever you lived, killing everyone except you?


SITH HAPPENS
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Old 06-06-2010, 07:34 PM   #592
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I'd write a bestselling novel about it and make millions.

What if this started flirting with you:

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Old 06-06-2010, 07:57 PM   #593
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I'd walk up indifferently and cook some of my family's NFL superbowl recipie nachos in it. And maybe give it a slap on the ass as a thank you. Because I'm a jerk.


What if you had to spend a weekend on a plane next to this guy with NO deodorant on board,
, and he wreaked of arm pit?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 06-06-2010, 08:03 PM   #594
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There's no way he'd keep his arms up the whole time.

What if he also had bad breath, smelly feet, and hadn't bathed in weeks?

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Old 06-06-2010, 08:24 PM   #595
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I'd prop the refreshments cart up on the door when he finally went to the restroom. Assuming TSA wouldn't detain him first. (BTW I'm pretty sure he wouldn't need to keep his arms up that whole time.)

What if Francis heard a witch?


We'll murder them all, amid laughter and merriment...except for the few we take home to experiment!

"I cant see S***! --YOU GO TO HELL!" --Tourettes guy
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Old 06-12-2010, 01:05 PM   #596
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I wouldn't know.

WWYDI Adam West was your best friend?


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 06-12-2010, 02:44 PM   #597
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HOOOOOLY DING BATS, BATMAN! - TO THE BATDUNG CAVE, BATMAN! - HOOOOOLY SPANDEX ARE RIDING UP MY ASS, BATMAN!..............yeah I'd probably say stuff like that just to annoy the crap out of him.






What if Holty1-5 was to immediatly post after my post?


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Old 06-12-2010, 02:51 PM   #598
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Then you would be Correct

(How did you Know?)

What if Batman and Robin became Hotdog man and Candy Boy

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Old 06-12-2010, 04:33 PM   #599
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Then Joker would never ask Why so serious?


What would you do if you won the battle, but lost the war?


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 06-12-2010, 05:26 PM   #600
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I Would wonder how? As if i just one a Battle they would have lost more Men than me.
Then Again Being Irish we were proberly Drunk at the Time xD

What if Ireland was United Under One Banner (My Banner)

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